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Upon picking my jaw off the floor, I concluded three important things: (1) my supposedly personal decisions regarding who I choose to fuck or date or marry are very much political, (2) so long as I date black men, I will carry their burden, and (3) while my decision to primarily date black men is a conscious one, it is not necessarily simple.

As a racially ambiguous woman, I have the privilege of changing the way society receives me at my discretion.

Over time I’ve found that the easiest way to change my ethnicity – change the way people treat me – is to change my company.

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I would just like to share a few comments that I hope will be as interesting for you as your article was for me.

First, you obviously have balls to put your stuff out there like this and I am not here to criticize or analyze you.

Both insatiable and lazy, he is creator of chaos and maker of his own inevitable demise; he is forever guilty beyond a reasonable doubt. As angry and volatile as their female counterparts, black men, by their very presence, give society reason to assume the defensive.

He is simultaneously invisible and ever present in the minds and lives of white America. Debased, filthy and unworthy, black men, we are told, are sexual deviants incapable of either desiring or maintaining healthy, meaningful relationships.

I knew that the Access Denied Pass did not extend to me – when I was in the “right” company, so shame on me for surrounding myself with such company, right? I still remember how I felt when I first dated a white man.

Last modified 12-Sep-2017 09:43